Akasully2 Posted March 23, 2014 Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 I was wondering if anyone has experienced any stirrers within their family or friends? Anyone who has gone out of their way to cause trouble for you in respect of your move? If so, how did you deal with them? I would like like to nominate my SIL for the Wooden Spoon Competition. She phoned her brother (my OH) last week to tell him not to accept the offer from their parents of putting us up for the final 3.5 weeks before we leave. She said that didn't really want us to stay with them, rather we had made it awkward for them to say no. She said it would kill them (charming) and that we had to stand on our own two feet once we got to Oz, so we might as well start acting independently now. She told us to look at living in a caravan instead! Gobsmacked, OH phoned his parents who said it was none of her business and that they would be offended if we didn't stay with them. They said they knew she got like this when she was unhappy and had upset people before and we should just ignore it, don't mention it. So the 'Princess' gets away with it again! In a couple of weeks, we are all going away together for a long weekend. How I am going to bite my tongue and smile politely as not to upset the parents is beyond me. Good intentions but once people have had a drink I wonder if something will be said. Who would you nominate? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
millar.wall.1985 Posted March 23, 2014 Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 theres been a few bitter little comments, certain family member (not my side) love to stick the boot in theres been stuff today and you just never know what to do for the best, I was guttered we were leaving familiy yesterday haha and today not so much ha its always other women though Dont let them get you down sully xxxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akasully2 Posted March 23, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 Just think, we can leave the horrible ones behind soon! Silver linings and all that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
millar.wall.1985 Posted March 23, 2014 Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 thats exactly what I keep thinking! ha its the genuine lovely people/family who will keep in touch and will make the effort xxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cocolevi Posted March 23, 2014 Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 It's sad that she'd want to upset you before you leave x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akasully2 Posted March 23, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 It's sad that she'd want to upset you before you leave x She was manipulative and devious when we got married. Somehow came out smelling of roses though. Maybe she is jealous. I feel sorry for my OH. He said he would have it out with her but doesn't want to leave on bad terms and not see her for 10 years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sideshowdeb Posted March 23, 2014 Report Share Posted March 23, 2014 As horrible as it is, at least you've seen her for what she is and it sounds as though you've dealt with it in a way that's meant you can still stay with your in laws and it be comfortable. As for the weekend away, well, that's a tough one! Such spiteful behaviour must come from a dark place. If anything, she's pitiful, as most who wield the wooden spoon are. Whenever you feel it's getting to you, think of what you have to look forward to, and be thankful that she's not part of it xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rossmoyne Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 Every family has one Akasully..... Ours is also my SIL and she has caused so many problems within the family through her lies, deception and bitchiness over the past 40 years. So much so that even her kids now call her by her christian name and have little to do with her. Makes it hard for my bro though and big family get togethers like weddings, christenings, big birthdays etc can be a tad fraught. I just pretend she isn't there and ignore her ..... keeps my blood pressure at a better level! All you can really do is have pity for people like this as they must have such a low sense of self-esteem and be so unhappy. At least you won't have to see her when you are in WA..... unless she invites herself for a holiday of course - in which case you book her into a caravan park and don't have her to stay with you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portlaunay Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 We got married a few weeks before Mrs p left. My dad didn't come to the wedding because he had to work the next day. We didn't say goodbye but it's no great loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest9824 Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 (edited) ..family ehhh. Haven't seen one of my brothers for over 12 years, we had a huge fall out on a nYE when my SIL verbally abused my mum and dad and I can never forgive her, or him for not stopping her. He didn't come to my dads funeral. Some are just drainers....be it family or friends. Edited March 24, 2014 by guest9824 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akasully2 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 What horrible people! Reading your posts has saddened me that there at such mean people out there in amongst our families, however, it has cheered me to know I am not alone. Thinking of her with pity and imagining just how low her self-esteem is (even if she does give it the biggen) will give me an inner smile to refer to when I think/see her. As for putting them up I a caravan park in WA, I think will be a sweet delight! Revenge best served cold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redsquare Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 My step MIL is a delight.. We were supposed to stay with her and FIL for about a month when we first got here, we stayed less than 2 weeks! I am never talking to that woman again. On the bright side, we met some lovely people over here who kindly put us up until we found a place of our own. Did I mention that I'm never talking to her again? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rossmoyne Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 What horrible people! Reading your posts has saddened me that there at such mean people out there in amongst our families, however, it has cheered me to know I am not alone. Thinking of her with pity and imagining just how low her self-esteem is (even if she does give it the biggen) will give me an inner smile to refer to when I think/see her. As for putting them up I a caravan park in WA, I think will be a sweet delight! Revenge best served cold. You go girl! I have discovered that you just have to "let go" of any stress that people like this cause you as they are not worth a second of your thoughts. Life is too short as it is for you to be upset about someone you do not wish to spend time with or energy on. And those little inner thoughts can be very empowering at times when you are faced with dealing with such a person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cocolevi Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 The saying "you can choose your friends but not your family" is so true my inlaws treat me and OH like 5 year olds even though we're both the wrong side of 40 and have managed to bring up 3 children but sil well she's just golden child x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest9824 Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 The flip side of this is that when you finally live here, and relies come to visit, the fun really starts! It can bring out the best and worst in family and friends, not all have negative experiences, but I have heard many have very strained relationships whilst having family stay. Having done it several times for friends and family, lovely to see them, but always happy to have my home back and no longer used as a B&B. It is a very unique situation living here and having family come stay and live with you again, sometimes I feel like the kid sister in my own home when older siblings come to stay. Just have a big supply of gin, no tonic, just gin, it will help! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
travelchic Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 Reading all of these posts makes me realise how lucky I am to have a supportive fambo. Debs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akasully2 Posted March 24, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 Reading all of these posts makes me realise how lucky I am to have a supportive fambo. Debs ok jammy, don't rub it in... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfie Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 one word or maybe 2 and a few expletives mother in law says it all nearly 2 years only phoned us 3 times .............................................. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portlaunay Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 This popped up on George Takei's FB page today. Seems rather apt: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akasully2 Posted March 25, 2014 Author Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 Very good. However, I would like my SIL to be the small figure on the far left who is falling off the earth into the abyss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portlaunay Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 Very good. However, I would like my SIL to be the small figure on the far left who is falling off the earth into the abyss. :laugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beandownunder Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 can i join in too? my SIL is a complete cow too, didn't come to our wedding, doesn't speak to any of us and has never met the kids! good job she lives in Essex and we never need to run into her. my parents have been visiting their lifelong friends ( class them as our aunt and uncle) uncle says we are stupid for wanting to leave, we have a perfectly comfortable life here, both have good jobs, lovely home, close family and the kids are happy so why would we even consider it? whatever!...I've toughened up! yeah :-) its thanks to you guys so cheers xxxxxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest9824 Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 can i join in too? my SIL is a complete cow too, didn't come to our wedding, doesn't speak to any of us and has never met the kids! good job she lives in Essex and we never need to run into her.my parents have been visiting their lifelong friends ( class them as our aunt and uncle) uncle says we are stupid for wanting to leave, we have a perfectly comfortable life here, both have good jobs, lovely home, close family and the kids are happy so why would we even consider it? whatever!...I've toughened up! yeah :-) its thanks to you guys so cheers xxxxxxxx Drainers Bean.... x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odies Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 One thing it certainly does is bring out the rotters in your life and makes you think who will I actually miss?? so true Pea lots of people are drainers.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou8670 Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 Trying to think of someone I could get cross with...but I can't think of anyone?!?!? I sometimes clash with my MIL but really she's great and can't do enough for us. I've learnt she can't keep a secret though so I'll be more careful in future! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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