beandownunder Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 My best friend (of 26 years!) gave me a card lately it says " a friend is a hand thats always holding yours, no matter how close or far you may be" I know we will always be best friends and I am not worried about that. I also feel I have already made some good links with lovely people in Perth and I currently have friends all over the world, so I know those who are important will remain so. I guess my question is just how have you done with maintaining friendships after the big move and how easy is it to make new friends once there? J x:wubclub: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Some have surprised me in good and bad ways -some people who I thought would be a definite (and cried the hardest when we left), despite very active attempts on my part haven't really kept in touch, whilst others who we thought might drift off have been a constant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest9824 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 My best friend (of 26 years!) gave me a card lately it says " a friend is a hand thats always holding yours, no matter how close or far you may be" I know we will always be best friends and I am not worried about that. I also feel I have already made some good links with lovely people in Perth and I currently have friends all over the world, so I know those who are important will remain so.I guess my question is just how have you done with maintaining friendships after the big move and how easy is it to make new friends once there? J x:wubclub: Good question Bean. In life we have 'friends' 'aquaintances' 'fair weather friends', but just sometimes you meet someone and know instantly there is a bond, one which lasts a lifetime. I am lucky to still have my best friend in the UK, although as with all things, our friendship has had it's ups and downs, but we 'get' each other... We have had some friends here, not from a forum, who we thought also were like minded good friends, but sadly that wasn't the case. It's hard to comprehend how some people can just take and think that is ok, that to me is not a healthy friendship, but I know of many who have friendships like that, not for me anymore. I guess my best friend too is my hubby, he puts up with me, hugs me when I cry and is there to tell me to toughen up...pretty much what a bestie does! ... peax Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Good question and like you I think I know who will stay my friend in OZ and who will slip away but it'll be good to hear how people have gotten on with actually making friends. My best friend won't go anywhere we are like sisters and she will be hardest to leave and she's not too up for coming to Perth so I think seeing. Physically each other will be difficult but we just connected we met through a forum it was meant to be. I feel I'm good at making friends but I'm not good at judging who I should deeply invest in and I often get burnt...hopefully I can make some good friends in perth (I'm hopeful anyway ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
verystormy Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 My best friend in the UK sends fairly long emails once every couple of weeks. Others say hello on facebook and things Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odies Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 lots of my friends do not use facebook, so I think the same ones who send cards to my family in Oz will be the same when we come over. I just hope some come to visit. We have just broke up a good friendship over the co-op coming to our area and how it would affect the shop, people are very funny really as pea states the main true friend is your other half Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nikkis2000 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Don't underestimate the power of the technology we have available to us now! It makes things so much easier, especially keeping in touch with those that aren't so close. Although in terms of closer relationships, as Ali said, they require effort from both sides. Its early days for us so, in terms of making new friends, I am trying to make the most of opportunities we're given to meet new people. Whether it's invites from friends, workmates or even certain meet ups from here! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beandownunder Posted April 29, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Don't underestimate the power of the technology we have available to us now! It makes things so much easier, especially keeping in touch with those that aren't so close. Although in terms of closer relationships, as Ali said, they require effort from both sides. Its early days for us so, in terms of making new friends, I am trying to make the most of opportunities we're given to meet new people. Whether it's invites from friends, workmates or even certain meet ups from here! I totally get how much easier it is to stay in touch now than it would have been say even ten years ago. It's the main reason I use Facebook as I have uni friends scattered over the globe and it means I get to "see" their lives. I'm sure I would keep in touch with lots of friends, I just find it interesting to see how it has all panned out for people starting from scratch again :0) I too look forward to some pre-arranged meet ups ;-) x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou8670 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I had this little momento from a friend who I don't see very often but we try to catch up when we can. We went to school, art college and Uni together and even lived in London together. We haven't lived close to one another for the last 20 years but she's told me she'll always be thinking of me and will try to visit us in Perth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nikkis2000 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Ooh Lou that gave me goosebumps! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
no1mum Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Hi the whole process you analyse everything you do and what you have to lose and gain. I nearly did not come due to best friend of 19 years feelings, however, I went ahead as was best thing for hubby, me and daughter, and when I sold my house (I lived opposite her) and went into rented whilst sorting out the final bits, she stopped talking to me. Met up in Jan and she told me her feelings, (not pleasant). I felt heartbroken, however, people come in and out of our lives, and we have to take a positive from every experience. Don't see leaving beloved friends as a negative, they have been, possibablly will continue to be in your life. Embrace these new opportunities to meet all us other like minded folk, who were brave enough to say I want to experience more out of life than what I had in the Uk. x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I had this little momento from a friend who I don't see very often but we try to catch up when we can. We went to school, art college and Uni together and even lived in London together. We haven't lived close to one another for the last 20 years but she's told me she'll always be thinking of me and will try to visit us in Perth I have made a sign for my best friend with this saying on it - I've not given it to her yet but I hope she likes it ? Your friend sounds soooo lovely to give you that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hopeful Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I had this little momento from a friend who I don't see very often but we try to catch up when we can. We went to school, art college and Uni together and even lived in London together. We haven't lived close to one another for the last 20 years but she's told me she'll always be thinking of me and will try to visit us in Perth I saw this and many more in York today and thought I am going to buy them for my friends when we leave. My closest friend also bought me a friendship globe for my birthday recently which sort of signified to me that no matter where we are in the world we will still have the same connection and contact. We lived in NZ for a year and had a regular Friday slot for a two hour Skype session- we both arranged our days around ensuring we would make our appointment with each other, probably more scheduled and regular than we ve done since we got back! We also used to phone when our friends had big get together so we could speak to everyone and still socialise at the parties! It was good fun and didn't make us more homesick but was just a novel way to stay in touch with everyone, gave us our fix! i have a friend just returning from Perth though who said she found it a lot harder than she thought she would to make friends but I think you have just got to take up all opportunities, make the effort and whether friends or acquaintances I am sure there will be someone to talk to! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arwen Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Hi the whole process you analyse everything you do and what you have to lose and gain. I nearly did not come due to best friend of 19 years feelings, however, I went ahead as was best thing for hubby, me and daughter, and when I sold my house (I lived opposite her) and went into rented whilst sorting out the final bits, she stopped talking to me. Met up in Jan and she told me her feelings, (not pleasant). I felt heartbroken, however, people come in and out of our lives, and we have to take a positive from every experience. Don't see leaving beloved friends as a negative, they have been, possibablly will continue to be in your life. Embrace these new opportunities to meet all us other like minded folk, who were brave enough to say I want to experience more out of life than what I had in the Uk. x How very sad for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akasully2 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I had this little momento from a friend who I don't see very often but we try to catch up when we can. We went to school, art college and Uni together and even lived in London together. We haven't lived close to one another for the last 20 years but she's told me she'll always be thinking of me and will try to visit us in Perth That saying reminds me of the quote, "Your teeth are like the stars, they both come out at night". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou8670 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I have made a sign for my best friend with this saying on it - I've not given it to her yet but I hope she likes it ? Your friend sounds soooo lovely to give you that That's lovely Jen; she must be a really good friend This is one of my constant friends who has always been there and made a special effort to come and see me when I was back in the UK visiting my parents. I probably have a dozen life long friends and lots more I hope to keep in touch with but I know life often gets in the way. I think it's a real shame when friends take your move personally. After all they should embrace your move but I'd give them a bit of slack; if you're really close it'll feel like a break up and they'll need time to come to terms with it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I think you've hit the nail on the head there Lou!! It will definitely feel like a break up I know that it does already....she's going to take it so hard and it will be for me like saying "I love you so much but I've gotta leave you I've gotta so this for me" because she's already said she won't do it with me.... You're obviously very important to each other and I'm glad you both find time for one and other xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beandownunder Posted April 29, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I think you've hit the nail on the head there Lou!! It will definitely feel like a break up I know that it does already....she's going to take it so hard and it will be for me like saying "I love you so much but I've gotta leave you I've gotta so this for me" because she's already said she won't do it with me.... You're obviously very important to each other and I'm glad you both find time for one and other xxx My best friend cries her eyes out every time she watches wanted down under thinking of me being there :-( however she's being really supportive, if a little distant at times, and will visit if/when we go- her cousin lives in Perth so added incentive :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Awwww bless her! Oh yes mine is the same!!! I'm pleased she's going to visit you that's good! I think my girl will visit me if she can they've other friends too but "don't wanna be stuck in perth all that time it's not worth it it's too isolated" so we would likely meet in Bali.....! They love it there! We can help each other through that too J childcare, friends, shifts aaaaaaaah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikkiwd Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 I have had my bestie since primary 6, 24 years! She is such a warm, caring and crazy person and I love her to bits. She is very supportive of the move but she is used to me going away as I have lived all over the place in the last 15 years. Although we can go a couple of months without seeing each other we have always stayed in touch, there is no pressure or expectations of how often we have to speak or meet as we both know our own lives are busy but its lovely to have someone just a silly text away. She said she will come out to visit but so have a lot of other friends, I understand Oz is not a cheap or easy place to get to so I won't hold grudges if they don't make it, after all it was our decision to move so far away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou8670 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Thailand, Singapore...all great places to holiday with friends and loved ones if Perth seems too far! Neutral ground and a holiday for all too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beandownunder Posted April 29, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 Awwww bless her! Oh yes mine is the same!!! I'm pleased she's going to visit you that's good! I think my girl will visit me if she can they've other friends too but "don't wanna be stuck in perth all that time it's not worth it it's too isolated" so we would likely meet in Bali.....! They love it there! We can help each other through that too J childcare, friends, shifts aaaaaaaah for sure JP xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elaineh33 Posted April 29, 2014 Report Share Posted April 29, 2014 My lovely best friend of nearly 30 yrs has been so supportive and is already planning her visit (she'd come along with me if she could lol) I'm going to miss her heaps but I know no matter where we are in the world we ll always be friends. I have friends all over the world and love the fact that despite not seeing each other all the time we can just pick right up from where we left off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy little Vegemite Posted April 30, 2014 Report Share Posted April 30, 2014 I had this little momento from a friend who I don't see very often but we try to catch up when we can. We went to school, art college and Uni together and even lived in London together. We haven't lived close to one another for the last 20 years but she's told me she'll always be thinking of me and will try to visit us in Perth There was a little gang of four of us in the UK that met up weekly, took it in turns to have the others round for copious cups of tea and cake while the kids had a play date. I gave them all a coaster before I left so that I could still join in, each with a similar saying on it, my favourite was the same as yours Lou, and also 'life's truest happiness is found in the friendships we make along the way'.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest9824 Posted April 30, 2014 Report Share Posted April 30, 2014 I think friendships moves in cycles too, the ones you had at school, uni, and then work. Then the ones you make if you have kids, then the ones you make when the kids are grown up. Then there is the ones you make when you take on a life changing adventure, friends who understand what you have been through, are going through and will go through. They may be there to enjoy the good days, see you through the bad days and all the in between days. I admit that my list of expats friends has shrunk considerably now, and most of whom I consider good friends are australian, not something I thought would happen a few years back but there you go... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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