jo and scott Posted June 16, 2014 Report Share Posted June 16, 2014 Hi pp After living with the mil for 10 months I'm ready to move out and get our own place again. Struggling with a few things and so are our girls. Even our cat looks miserable :-(( Feels like we are never gonna get to oz. we need 8 years worth of p60s but we only have 4. I have requested the info from the tax office link which visa bureau gave us but this can take up to 40 days !! :-( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
portlaunay Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 I can only imagine how hard that must be. I couldn't have done it. How much longer do you have left? The Shawshank Redemption was on the other night. Maybe you could get a large poster for the wall and start tunnelling out? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nikkis2000 Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Chin up Jo! You've done so well to make it this far (I just about managed two weeks with my MIL!) How far through are you now- I've lost track? P60s sounds like you're on the form 80? If so then then end is nearly in sight from an application perspective at least? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikkiwd Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 I couldn't have managed half that at my MIL'S! Are the p60's for the visa application or the skills assessment? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou8670 Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Jo, you've done amazing well. I certainly wouldn't have been able to manage so long with either my parents or in laws. The end will be in sight...keep going it'll be worth it in the end Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odies Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 just a word from a mother in law, some of us are nice, or we think we are nice. but good luck Joe x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flatpack Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 We were nearly sleeping in our caravan on the in-laws drive! We sold our house to them so at least we'd still have been at home. The OH insisted she could not live there for 3 months lol so we moved into a small apartment and I'm glad we did. Although the MIL does cracking food! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 thanks guys ! scott wants to move into a caravan, he must be desperate as i know how much he hates them !! i think once we have the paperwork from the tax office it all has to be signed by a solicitor, then sent off to visa bureau, they then book scott on the skills test, then its just police checks and medicals, its also having enough money to go with too. we are saving but its hard. we have a loan which needs paying off, we are planning to pay it off before we go, but maybe we shouldnt bother and just keep making the payments. does anyone else have that ?? flatpack, sounds good where you are, having cracking food !! we've not once sat down altogether for a meal unless we have gone out to eat :-( mil loves her aunt bessies everything and wont eat with us. i hate moaning and dont want to sound ungrateful, im just having a rather stressful few weeks. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cocolevi Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Don't worry it will all come together I can't be with my Mil for more than an hour so you've done well so far keep smiling x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 I think it's really hard to live with parents again when you've been independent, I used to struggle staying anywhere - I was always pulling the kids up saying, don't make too much noise, don't do this, don't do that and I always felt I was imposing. You don't sound ungrateful .. just normal lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sideshowdeb Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 You've done so well. We had the possibility of living with Rich's parents for 9 weeks and we couldn't do it. The sacrifice you've made so far is amazing and it will all be worth it in the end. I know you're saving hard but maybe a little break would help... Sounds like you all deserve a treat! As for the loan, I know lots of people leave commitments behind and pay them off from Oz. If it gets you on your way sooner than it's definitely worth looking into xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Thankyou. That's exactly what I've been doing Ali. Permanently tidying up after them. I wish they could make a mess and not worry about it ! The constant moaning about the cat is annoying. Havnt you done your ironing yet?? NO !!!! Omg I'm going crazy. Xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 17, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 You've done so well. We had the possibility of living with Rich's parents for 9 weeks and we couldn't do it. The sacrifice you've made so far is amazing and it will all be worth it in the end. I know you're saving hard but maybe a little break would help... Sounds like you all deserve a treat! As for the loan, I know lots of people leave commitments behind and pay them off from Oz. If it gets you on your way sooner than it's definitely worth looking into xx Thanks deb :-) the time has flown by, can't believe its been this long! We are going to Cornwall for a week but both of our mums are coming too, it was booked before we had even thought about oz. Scott is going to book a 2nd week off work and we are going to do stuff just the 4 of us :-)) really looking forward to the second week !! Think we might leave the loan and just keep paying it when we get to oz. depends how much we can save. Xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sideshowdeb Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Oh Jo.... You couldn't make it up! Still, you can't beat Cornwall, even though it's not just the 4 of you..... You'll laugh about this one day xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gar374 Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Hi, I saw your post mentioning the P60's for the past 8 years. We're with Visa Bureau as well but at the very beginning of the process - I'm just working on the references for employment. Will I have to supply P60's? Will payslips do? Not that I have those - ours were all electronic and I never printed them before I left. I worked for the same company for the last 15 years and ACS will be assessing my skills. Any chance you can post the link VB sent you, or PM it to me? Good luck at the mother in laws - we stayed with mine when we moved house and 5 weeks was plenty! Thanks Gareth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 Oh I hear you Jo!! I am living with my MIL not sure I can do this until next Summer which is apparently when we are moving now Argh (where has my Jan timeframe gone?)! I have had to leave our cat with my parents (the children and I lived there for 2 months too but missed hubby as no room for him!) because she will rehome it if we bring her hear. My MIL is an alcoholic who moans and groans about anything, anyone and everything you do! I appreciate what she is doing and most of the time it is OK but the moaning about the children and how or what we are doing is slowing turning me mad - she is away this week - OOOOH THE JOY!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Walkabout Posted June 17, 2014 Report Share Posted June 17, 2014 I have no advice, there is no way I could have done it, sending you lots of hugs and strength to get through the next bits! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lou8670 Posted June 18, 2014 Report Share Posted June 18, 2014 Oh I hear you Jo!! I am living with my MIL not sure I can do this until next Summer which is apparently when we are moving now Argh (where has my Jan timeframe gone?)! I have had to leave our cat with my parents (the children and I lived there for 2 months too but missed hubby as no room for him!) because she will rehome it if we bring her hear. My MIL is an alcoholic who moans and groans about anything, anyone and everything you do! I appreciate what she is doing and most of the time it is OK but the moaning about the children and how or what we are doing is slowing turning me mad - she is away this week - OOOOH THE JOY!!!! Oh Jen, sending you hugs too. I'm not sure how you and Jo are managing it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted June 18, 2014 Report Share Posted June 18, 2014 Thanks Lou - everyone has mountains to climb....this is mine haha xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2014 Hi, I saw your post mentioning the P60's for the past 8 years. We're with Visa Bureau as well but at the very beginning of the process - I'm just working on the references for employment. Will I have to supply P60's? Will payslips do? Not that I have those - ours were all electronic and I never printed them before I left. I worked for the same company for the last 15 years and ACS will be assessing my skills. Any chance you can post the link VB sent you, or PM it to me? Good luck at the mother in laws - we stayed with mine when we moved house and 5 weeks was plenty! Thanks Gareth hi gareth, im not sure what paperwork people need for their visas, only that we needed 8 years worth of p60s, im happy to send you the link tho, which i will do in a mo, but might just be worth checking with visa bureau in case you dont need it. jo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2014 Oh I hear you Jo!! I am living with my MIL not sure I can do this until next Summer which is apparently when we are moving now Argh (where has my Jan timeframe gone?)! I have had to leave our cat with my parents (the children and I lived there for 2 months too but missed hubby as no room for him!) because she will rehome it if we bring her hear. My MIL is an alcoholic who moans and groans about anything, anyone and everything you do! I appreciate what she is doing and most of the time it is OK but the moaning about the children and how or what we are doing is slowing turning me mad - she is away this week - OOOOH THE JOY!!!! ahh jen, i dont feel like i have anything to moan about ! sounds like you are having a worse time than me :-( big hugs, fingers crossed the time will fly by, i know this past year for us has. i dont know how you are doing it, hope your enjoying this week, i know the feeling ;-)) i know what you mean about the timeframe tho, im hoping to be in oz before lauren starts senior school in sept 2015, and thought we would have had lots of money saved up by now but the reality is very different, there always seems to be something to pay out for, we have cornwall coming up soon, and laurens birthday, it was my mums birthday last week, booked us to go to the savoy for afternoon tea and see wicked in the evening, ive not had the money to treat my mum before so it feels great to be able to do this, ive even booked us a car so we dont have to get the train, the show wont finish until about 10.30 and i dont fancy getting the train back at that time. mum doesnt know about the car and i cant wait to see her face next saturday !! :-)) going to save hard after cornwall. MIL has gone to ascot today and wont be home until 10 tonight !! so ive hung out the washing, made a nice cuppa and gonna have a catch up on here :-) jo. xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenPen Posted June 19, 2014 Report Share Posted June 19, 2014 Yes I know what you mean!! We thought we could pay for visas at end of this month but we don't have the money!! Always something to pay out for and I've been offered two jobs but not locally but I still don't know what to do argh wobbles majorly now!!!! I hope you have a nice day! Your mums bday treat sound perfect I hope she enjoys every second as I'm sure you both will xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2014 Yes I know what you mean!! We thought we could pay for visas at end of this month but we don't have the money!! Always something to pay out for and I've been offered two jobs but not locally but I still don't know what to do argh wobbles majorly now!!!! I hope you have a nice day! Your mums bday treat sound perfect I hope she enjoys every second as I'm sure you both will xxx thats great that you've been offered 2 jobs jen ! what would you do with the kids ? what ages are your children ? there is no way my mil would have mine if i were to get a job, plus there is the added worry or laurens diabetes, scotts mum still doesnt really know what to do. we are both so excited about mums birthday treat next week, i cant wait :-) xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rossmoyne Posted June 19, 2014 Report Share Posted June 19, 2014 I need to thank you all for your comments about living with your MIL. It brought back to me the time my kids and I emigrated to Oz and we lived with my parents for 5 months. It was a tough time for all of us as three generations living together are bound to push the boundaries constantly. But now I am the MIL with my daughter and SIL living with me whilst their house is being built..... so all your comments just made me take stock and think about how I react to them after a while of living alone.... Before they moved in we set some ground rules so we all knew where we stood.... but your comments have made me realise I do need to step back a bit now too. So thank you guys for all you have shared. I love my Daughter and her husband so much and don't want to jeopardise our good relationship. Think I might be having lots of long weekends away and holidays!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jo and scott Posted June 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2014 I need to thank you all for your comments about living with your MIL. It brought back to me the time my kids and I emigrated to Oz and we lived with my parents for 5 months. It was a tough time for all of us as three generations living together are bound to push the boundaries constantly. But now I am the MIL with my daughter and SIL living with me whilst their house is being built..... so all your comments just made me take stock and think about how I react to them after a while of living alone.... Before they moved in we set some ground rules so we all knew where we stood.... but your comments have made me realise I do need to step back a bit now too. So thank you guys for all you have shared. I love my Daughter and her husband so much and don't want to jeopardise our good relationship. Think I might be having lots of long weekends away and holidays!!!! aww thanks rossy, sounds like you are a very caring and thoughtful mum / mil. my mum is fab, shes my best friend, but she has said that there is no way she would have us all living with her lol ! shes on her own and her home is just big enough for her, so theres no room for us anyway, and i know she likes her own space. my mil has a normal 3 bed house so we do manage it okay, and there is a spare tv room / games room so my girls can watch what they like. i do get on really well with my mil and couldnt live here if i didnt, but for me, i guess id like to eat together, it sounds really silly but it feels very seperate, she has her food and we have ours. shes not an emotional person either, which i struggle with a bit, i have a few issues going on at the mo with school stuff, but i know there is no point even speaking to her about it cos she just wouldnt be interested. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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