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Why did you move back to the UK


steven_gers

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I absolutely love it here and have no intention of going back, but family would be the pull for me. I never anticipated how hard it would be as I was not particularly close to my family, but it is my aunt I really miss, and I know that I cannot go back at the moment for a holiday, as I would not get back on the plane to come back, knowing how painful and sad it has been at times.

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We love it here but the pull of the family will do it and if oh does not get a job then we will not have a choice will have to go back.

But I am been positive daugher will get her visa and oh will get a job.

out of interest what does ur OH do for a living? and how long have you been there?

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Been here nearly two years now. The first year you compare everything to what you know/did back in the UK. You miss the familiar.

 

it would be easy street to just head back, but before you know it, your not comparing. You've gone out and found work, new friends. You get on with life.

 

I had to go back to the UK in April, looking at it from open eyes while there, in this moment in time, wild horses wouldn't get me to go back.

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We moved back because of family and friends, nothing else... We are now heading back to Perth hopefully be back by September and I cannot wait. I will really miss my family and friends but agree with Portlaunay we want to move forward and that is where we should have stayed Perth. X

 

Also agree!!!! Seems a lifetime ago we came back for family-pregnancy hormones didn't help! But what I thought I missed-the family occasions, weddings, big family roast dinners on a Sunday, Christmas's with extended family and grandparents, the children having fun with grandparents, Aunts (sleepovers etc) didn't happen (don't think they really ever did!) Those rose tinted glasses are terrible things!!! And the memories that I had were just that-memories. Coming back to the UK didn't make any of us happier, just made us realise how lucky we were and what we had in Perth and how much we missed what we had.

Now feel like we have spent a lifetime trying to get back to Perth-trying to be better off financially to make it a little easier for us as a family to make the big move back. We were lucky, we all got Citizenship-I don't know how I would feel if we didn't have that.

 

Don't get me wrong-maybe I am looking at our time in Perth also with those rose tinted glasses, but if we don't give it another go, we will never know, and will always be a big regret, so house going on the market next week and making the move back before end of Oct-yay!!!

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Another one here who doesn't contemplate going back, been here 7.5 years and no thoughts even for a holiday. Your post gave me a little pause and I realise that as a family, since arriving we've always referred to the UK as 'the UK' or my son says England - we've never called it home whilst we've been here. I miss family and friends, but now have such a great set of friends some of which are like family.

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Also agree!!!! Seems a lifetime ago we came back for family-pregnancy hormones didn't help! But what I thought I missed-the family occasions' date=' weddings, big family roast dinners on a Sunday, Christmas's with extended family and grandparents, the children having fun with grandparents, Aunts (sleepovers etc) didn't happen (don't think they really ever did!) Those rose tinted glasses are terrible things!!! And the memories that I had were just that-memories. Coming back to the UK didn't make any of us happier, just made us realise how lucky we were and what we had in Perth and how much we missed what we had.

Now feel like we have spent a lifetime trying to get back to Perth-trying to be better off financially to make it a little easier for us as a family to make the big move back. We were lucky, we all got Citizenship-I don't know how I would feel if we didn't have that.

 

Don't get me wrong-maybe I am looking at our time in Perth also with those rose tinted glasses, but if we don't give it another go, we will never know, and will always be a big regret, so house going on the market next week and making the move back before end of Oct-yay!!![/quote']

Good luck with the move, hopefully it is everything it ever was and everything you now want it too be.

Edited by steven_gers
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We nearly went back. We got as far as my wife going for a recie to look at places to live. The reason was that I was not settled and not enjoying my job. Part of it I think was being on a 457 which felt very uncertain. That and financially we would be better off. I get paid the same amount if I live in the uk and work in Africa as I would living in Oz and working in Africa, but in the uk I would be tax free. So a significant financial incentive.

 

When we gained PR it helped a lot. Then when we started to put down roots it helped a lot more.

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We nearly went back. We got as far as my wife going for a recie to look at places to live. The reason was that I was not settled and not enjoying my job. Part of it I think was being on a 457 which felt very uncertain. That and financially we would be better off. I get paid the same amount if I live in the uk and work in Africa as I would living in Oz and working in Africa, but in the uk I would be tax free. So a significant financial incentive.

 

When we gained PR it helped a lot. Then when we started to put down roots it helped a lot more.

 

I think that might be one of the keys VS ... the migrant life can be unsettling living in rentals, putting down some roots helped us have a sense of belonging.

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Goof luck with the move, hopefully it is everything it ever was and everything you now want it too be.

 

 

Thanks Steven_gers, like Portlaunay says "I have to move forwards, ever forwards, never back" good luck to you and your family xx

 

(This is a good saying, and one that I shall try and live by even when I am having a moment of "rose tintedness!!!")

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Also agree!!!! Seems a lifetime ago we came back for family-pregnancy hormones didn't help! But what I thought I missed-the family occasions' date=' weddings, big family roast dinners on a Sunday, Christmas's with extended family and grandparents, the children having fun with grandparents, Aunts (sleepovers etc) didn't happen (don't think they really ever did!) Those rose tinted glasses are terrible things!!! And the memories that I had were just that-memories. Coming back to the UK didn't make any of us happier, just made us realise how lucky we were and what we had in Perth and how much we missed what we had.

Now feel like we have spent a lifetime trying to get back to Perth-trying to be better off financially to make it a little easier for us as a family to make the big move back. We were lucky, we all got Citizenship-I don't know how I would feel if we didn't have that.

 

Don't get me wrong-maybe I am looking at our time in Perth also with those rose tinted glasses, but if we don't give it another go, we will never know, and will always be a big regret, so house going on the market next week and making the move back before end of Oct-yay!!![/quote']

 

Oh my goodness, your story is so similar to mine, I had our second child out there, so was by hormonal!!! And thought I want to be home with everyone but realized after a great deal of time actually we want to be back in Perth. So it has taken us a long time to try and get back out there. Hopefully see you in Sept/Oct too! :)

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Oh my goodness, your story is so similar to mine, I had our second child out there, so was by hormonal!!! And thought I want to be home with everyone but realized after a great deal of time actually we want to be back in Perth. So it has taken us a long time to try and get back out there. Hopefully see you in Sept/Oct too! :)

 

Hey English Rose-That is amazing!! How long were you there for and how long have you been back?!? We were out there for just under 3 years (very small amount of time but huge impact on our lives) We had our 3rd daughter out there, came back-reasons as explained-within 9 months we knew we had made the wrong decision!!! Also decided on having 4th child after being back few months, another girl and now been back nearly 5 long years, two house makeovers later and desperate to get back!!!

Hopefully though, this time we are very much more mature (more in life than age itself!!) financially astute and realise what is more important to us. We hopefully know what to expect a bit more and are more confident as people-and definitely no chance of having any more hormonal issues!!!! HA HA!!!!

We were NOR and hoping to go back same sort of area (dependant on work etc) where were you??

(sorry to go of original topic xxx)

Jess xx

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Not really going off topic, its very interesting to read everyones "ping pong" type stories so far.

 

Im not yet over there, but my wife(originally from perth) are moving out later this year or start of Jan,

My wife will have a job as soon as she lands since she works for an Oz company. But I'd hope to be in a job within a month as I wont settle if I've not got a job. I couldnt be a house husband especially when the little 1 will be in school.

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Hey English Rose-That is amazing!! How long were you there for and how long have you been back?!? We were out there for just under 3 years (very small amount of time but huge impact on our lives) We had our 3rd daughter out there' date=' came back-reasons as explained-within 9 months we knew we had made the wrong decision!!! Also decided on having 4th child after being back few months, another girl and now been back nearly 5 long years, two house makeovers later and desperate to get back!!!

Hopefully though, this time we are very much more mature (more in life than age itself!!) financially astute and realise what is more important to us. We hopefully know what to expect a bit more and are more confident as people-and definitely no chance of having any more hormonal issues!!!! HA HA!!!!

We were NOR and hoping to go back same sort of area (dependant on work etc) where were you??

(sorry to go of original topic xxx)

Jess xx[/quote']

 

hi Jess,

we only lived in Perth Riveton Sor for 18months, had a baby who ended up in hospital for four days at three weeks old, had to move twice whilst heavily pregnant on our own, in rentals as the owners wanted to sell, my husbands Nan's both unfortunately passed away, and we felt very alone as we have lots of family and friends back in UK so we cut our losses and came back. In hind sight we should have tried to be strong and stick it out even though we felt alot as against us. We have been back in UK same amount of time pretty much and wanted to go back. We were going to give it another year here, but my husband has been offered a job and sponsorship to head back to Perth so we thought it is too good of an opportunity to turn down. We also feel ready and know what to expect so we are going to try and do things differently this time. When we told our families and friends they were not surprised and said they could tell we are not settled. So we are doing it all again, which I never ever thought we would do. Put our house on the market five weeks ago and got an offer last week. Hoping to be there Sept depending on how long the visa takes. I am dreading the goodbyes again but keep thinking of what we are heading to.

You sound like you have your hands full with four children! I have two and that's enough! :)

 

i think what Ali said is totally true, living in rentals etc does not help as you are so unsettled and not sure where to move to etc etc. This site has really really helped me with lots of concerns and its nice to share and understand we are not alone!!

Jo

xx

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We have been here 23 years and I am now retired. Although I would not want to live permanently back in the UK again, I have been thinking that I would like to go back for a few months and experience some of the things I loved about England just one more time. My entire family is in Australia, but I do have some very close friends in England and France, and want to spend time with them again. Sort of bucket list stuff I guess, and it is getting a tad long!

 

However I have to admit that the first two years we were in Perth I was so homesick that I could have walked back to England at any given time. I knew it was totally unreasonable to feel like this as I was the last member of the family to emigrate here, even my parents lived here, so I had no family to go back to, and I had spent years in my migration journey as it was where I wanted to be. But it were friends and places that I missed so much. We lived in a small town in Sussex and I missed all that went with living there. But the longer we were in WA and the more new friends and networks were made, the more settled I felt. I have been back to UK a few times and enjoy my holidays there, but I am always so very happy to come home to Perth.

 

We all change and we all grow in different ways, and those friends and places we loved also change and grow when we are not there. Over the years I have realised that the place my family and I had in some peoples lives has closed because we weren't there, and they have moved on with new relationships and experiences, as we have too. However there are a small group of close friends who are "family we choose", who come to visit us in Australia, as we do them in England, and with skype and email these days, those links are much easier to maintain than they were when all we had were expensive phone calls and Royal Mail/Australia Post. One thing I have learned strongly though is that those rose coloured specs do a good job of hiding the things that we didn't like.

 

So never be ashamed to feel homesick... it can be a very debilitating feeling and can physically hurt, but give yourself time to make a new life. For some people it can take a few years.... which was why I suppose the Ten Pound Poms had to stay in Oz for 2 years after emigrating or pay back all their emigration costs if they returned to UK before that two years was up. And if at the end of a few years you know that Oz isn't for you, well you have given it your best shot and can never say "if only we had done......" Australia isn't for everyone - it certainly isn't UK with sunshine - and it is no shame on you if you finally decide that UK is where you want to be - you tried it and you had an adventure..... store the experience and move on.

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There are two reasons why not for me. The first is that the UK never felt like home. Just because I was born there it doesn't make it home. Second is that word 'back'. I can't go back. I don't know what it is but I have to move forwards, ever forwards, never back.

 

A bit like a shark then? I heard they can't go backwards either.

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Reading this post is really good for me and will have to remember the rose tinted glasses.

I am still in the UK at the mo, but we are moving September. I am really close to both my sisters, and I am absolutely dreading leaving my niece. We were 4 months into our visa process when my sister called me to say she was preg. I cried for a week. The baby is now 9 months old, and Im sat here now watching her sleep and she is such a little cutie. I cried saying good bye to her when she went on hols for 10 days. I cant even contemplate how hard its going to be. We are even going to miss her 1st birthday party. my sister did say she would move it forward, but at the end of the day, these are the things that I have resigned myself to do. Its the sacrifice for wanting more than the UK offers.

 

I am lucky in that my family and friends are excited for me, even if they dont want me to go. Most are already saving to come and visit. My sister is keen to also come to Australia and is looking to retrain as a Social Worker, so I am hopeful that one day my niece may also consider herself an Australian Resident. I am preparing myself for the ups and downs, but I dont suppose you realise how hard it is until you actually do it. But the world is getting smaller. The internet is a wonderful thing, and facetime and Skype are amazing.

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