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its now or never!!!.....not sure what to do!!


mwjw

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well the time has come to make the decision, the wife and i are split on it!!!

 

I can see where shes coming from as we would be taking a grandchild, cousin and nephew away from his family and the thought of starting up from scratch in a new country with no support is frightening.

 

I know no one can give me the answer, just had to vent somewhere!!!

 

I want to go for it, but dont want us to struggle with no help and with a 6 month old baby..

 

What to do!!......:wacko:

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'Nothing ventured nothing gained', we moved to Johannesburg when we were 21, 6 months after we arrived wifey got pregnant, we ended up raising 2 beautiful children for 10 years with no family and very little help, didn't do us any harm, grandparents on both sides only visited us once in that 10 years, we couldn't afford to go back to the UK to visit.

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We went for a 'trial' life abroad in NZ with a 6 month old and a 10 and 12 yr old, stayed a year and went back to UK as 2 wanted to stay and 2 wanted to return (7 month old didn't have a view :laugh:

13 yrs on and we're all here in Perth, never really settled in UK after NZ, kids loved the experience and we think benefitted hugely from it.

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It is a very very hard decision that you can only make.

I miss my grandkids so much and it is so hard leaving family harder tban you think..

We came as we did not want to have any regrets in the future

if it does not work you can go back.

Good luck with your decision.

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You all need to want to give it a go or there may be some resentment further down the line. It's got to be a family decision and one only your family can make. It is tough and if you decide to go for it you'll still feel like you're taking a leap of faith. Good luck!

Edited by Lou8670
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Hey J,

 

William is doing well thanks, finally seems to be sleeping a little!!! Its so tough, feel for Steph as its a hard decision for her. How are you getting along?

 

Mike

x

Mike,

 

the early days are tough enough but added to your pot is the possibility of leaving. this is hard enough for any of us but when you are tired and hormonal it's a recipe for extra sleepless nights :( keep strong together xxx

 

We are off in five and a bit weeks for our visit and looking forward to it. My friend emigrates to Adelaide next Tuesday and we visited her at the weekend. We had a heart to heart and she said if they had what we have ie lovely home with land, two secure jobs, very close family, kids in good schools, that she wouldn't consider leaving! certainly gives you food for thought seeing your life through someone else's eyes!!!

 

Good luck,

J x

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I met up with two lovely PP members today for our weekly get together walk along the Ocean. Walked for 2.5 hours nattering. We discussed how we sometimes had to pinch ourselves that we are actually here. We've been through that 'do we/don't we' phase and are really pleased we gave it a go. Neither of us (only 2 are Brits, one's an Ozzy) wanted to look back and regret not taking the opportunity whilst it was available to us. Been here nearly 4 months and we are loving it. It feels like home. Family are kept close with Skype and we are making loads of new friends. Admittedly, at the moment we don't have the invested years behind us that makes you have a shared history, but still, got to start somewhere and who knows, these could be our old friends in the future.

 

Be brave, give it a go but do your research first. I was OCD on asking questions and it paid off. The impulsive ones are often the ones that return before their container has even arrived. We discussed this and were in it 100% together. May have had wobbles but the principle of giving it a go held true throughout. Do what feels right for you.

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Well, I'm in the UK and both of my children were born here (I'm from Australia, husband is from the UK) and I have to say that 10 years on I still feel I'm missing out (as are my kids) on having parents/grandparents. My husband and I recently had our first night away together in 10 years as it's not like we can leave 2 kids with someone very often. It may be easier for a lot of you in Australia as you possibly have friends in the same boat who can help you out. But most of my friends here have family to help them so it's different.... and don't get me started on xmas when everyone leaves to spend time with their families and we end up at some horrendous hotel xmas dinner!

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I met up with two lovely PP members today for our weekly get together walk along the Ocean. Walked for 2.5 hours nattering. We discussed how we sometimes had to pinch ourselves that we are actually here. We've been through that 'do we/don't we' phase and are really pleased we gave it a go. Neither of us (only 2 are Brits, one's an Ozzy) wanted to look back and regret not taking the opportunity whilst it was available to us. Been here nearly 4 months and we are loving it. It feels like home. Family are kept close with Skype and we are making loads of new friends. Admittedly, at the moment we don't have the invested years behind us that makes you have a shared history, but still, got to start somewhere and who knows, these could be our old friends in the future.

 

Be brave, give it a go but do your research first. I was OCD on asking questions and it paid off. The impulsive ones are often the ones that return before their container has even arrived. We discussed this and were in it 100% together. May have had wobbles but the principle of giving it a go held true throughout. Do what feels right for you.

 

 

Now,that is the attitude to have when you emigrate:wink:

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Hey,

 

Thanks for the pep talk. The wife is worried about the finance side of things as in, if it doesnt work we go home broke. Can understand whats shes saying, shes in a hard place at the moment. Saying yes to please me and upset our familes or no to please the families and upset me, really feel for her. Its harder now with our little one, but i feel the opportunities are better in Oz for him. Think Steph is scared as she has to work for at least a year to get PR but doesnt want to miss out on Williams first years. Its a toughie!!

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I felt like your wife soon after having my boy...but as he got older (he's 1 next week) I realised I just want to give him the best opportunities....when the sun shines in the UK its fab getting out and about with him...but dreading the winter. In Oz there is so much more scope.

 

If it doesn't work out we will come home....but I'm really looking forward to the unique adventure just my husband, son and me!

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I think its just got to be the right time for you as a family. We had often discussed it over the years and my husband was the one that has always been keen to go, I too had reservations then our daughter came along in 2010 and for me personally i needed family around me as I needed reassurance being our first child and the comfort and support. For the first 1 - 2 yrs of her life I wanted family to see her first smile, word, crawling, walking all those little milestones.

But then it was me that brought it up again I had starting thinking about it, my cousin lives there and has said how brilliant it was and I saw pictures of her out in the sunshine with her little one and something just clicked and I felt like we had to give it a go and take advantage of this opportunity that not everyone gets, I didn't want to be left wondering what if!

So we started the ball rolling early last year and now we are just waiting on the visa to be granted and we are all so excited and can't wait to go.

So you really have got to reach a decision together and has to be the right time for you, I wish you well take your time and good luck :cute: Michelle x

Edited by Keith
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Hey,

 

Thanks for the pep talk. The wife is worried about the finance side of things as in, if it doesnt work we go home broke. Can understand whats shes saying, shes in a hard place at the moment. Saying yes to please me and upset our familes or no to please the families and upset me, really feel for her. Its harder now with our little one, but i feel the opportunities are better in Oz for him. Think Steph is scared as she has to work for at least a year to get PR but doesnt want to miss out on Williams first years. Its a toughie!!

 

 

Hey Mike

 

You two seem to be in a similar position to us. We are even from Notts,just a bit further north near Doncaster. We have a great life here,we have been given the best gift in the world,our son Callum. We are lucky that my partner Anne can stay at home and look after him. I work for myself so ultimately if I want to knock off early,start late,or even have a day off,I can. We have a lovely home and enjoy a good life here.

 

In OZ,I will have to start again. Having to retrain,starting as an apprentice almost,and work my way up again. At the age of 42,that will be fun!

We are taking my parents only grandson to the other side of the world. If it doesn't work out,we will have blown a whole load of cash and will return to the UK practically skint and I will have to work for somebody again.

 

So why do it? Because we can. What if things do work out? What if we love our new life over there? We are not kids chasing a dream. We can try it. We will try it. If you are both strong,enjoy life,and enjoy a challenge. Why not? My biggest regret would be lying on my bed just about to wander off to the pearly gates thinking. "I wish I had tried........"

 

Cheers

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That is a tough decsion!, and yes only one you guys can make, but remember and we are about to make the move so we understand your concern, though our situation is different, we are about to become grandparents but we are moving to the other side of the world, not easy, but you must live life doing what is best for you and your family!, you started this process wanting better, more, for yourself and your children, however, like some have said on this thread,, there are many mediums of communication, Skype, Facetime etc, all free with Wifi, better than phones because you can see your loved ones, share with them as well, its a flight and a bit to Perth, 19 hours, God I have taken that long to drive from the Highlands of Scotland down to Herts to visit friends on a couple of bad journeys, so its not the end of the world flying in and out its a day in your life! So do not let distance be a barrier, in today's world it is smaller than you think!

 

Alone - I/We have been all around Western Australia travelling with my Aussie born Wife (all our family lives in the UK), Western Australia is warm and friendly in climate and people, everyone will talk to you, the support network is fantastic because most people have been where you have been and understand how you feel, this site is a prime example of what people are really like out there, you have to do your bit as well and say hello, go to the meet and greet's, take up invitations and join for your wife mother and baby clubs/centres, my impression of life in Perth and WA is one of family/friend get togethers, and family life, the schools and climate are one that allows children to blossom, Yes there are bad bits and yes it can be a bit tough, but take away your immediate family and think why did you come to this decision? because of the bad bits and struggle in the UK?

 

I fought for this country and got injured in the process, my friends and colleagues died for this country - some by enemy fire, a lot by their own hand after the horror of what they have seen and done, this country mouths platitudes but little else unless the politicians are shamed into it, now we have the prospect of the country being split up, the UK no longer in existence as we know it now, we are being torn apart by racial and religious hatred, and greedy politicians, that is why we are moving - to a place where life is far easier and benign in warmth and friendliness.

 

Give your kids a chance mate, Love each other, be there for each other, be there for your kids and on the bad days remember its a bad day, tomorrow gets better, hug and love each other on the bad days and laugh and look forward to the next good day.

 

Your decision mate, me I'd go for broke! but whatever you decide good luck

 

Neil 24

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That is a tough decsion!, and yes only one you guys can make, but remember and we are about to make the move so we understand your concern, though our situation is different, we are about to become grandparents but we are moving to the other side of the world, not easy, but you must live life doing what is best for you and your family!, you started this process wanting better, more, for yourself and your children, however, like some have said on this thread,, there are many mediums of communication, Skype, Facetime etc, all free with Wifi, better than phones because you can see your loved ones, share with them as well, its a flight and a bit to Perth, 19 hours, God I have taken that long to drive from the Highlands of Scotland down to Herts to visit friends on a couple of bad journeys, so its not the end of the world flying in and out its a day in your life! So do not let distance be a barrier, in today's world it is smaller than you think!

 

Alone - I/We have been all around Western Australia travelling with my Aussie born Wife (all our family lives in the UK), Western Australia is warm and friendly in climate and people, everyone will talk to you, the support network is fantastic because most people have been where you have been and understand how you feel, this site is a prime example of what people are really like out there, you have to do your bit as well and say hello, go to the meet and greet's, take up invitations and join for your wife mother and baby clubs/centres, my impression of life in Perth and WA is one of family/friend get togethers, and family life, the schools and climate are one that allows children to blossom, Yes there are bad bits and yes it can be a bit tough, but take away your immediate family and think why did you come to this decision? because of the bad bits and struggle in the UK?

 

I fought for this country and got injured in the process, my friends and colleagues died for this country - some by enemy fire, a lot by their own hand after the horror of what they have seen and done, this country mouths platitudes but little else unless the politicians are shamed into it, now we have the prospect of the country being split up, the UK no longer in existence as we know it now, we are being torn apart by racial and religious hatred, and greedy politicians, that is why we are moving - to a place where life is far easier and benign in warmth and friendliness.

 

Give your kids a chance mate, Love each other, be there for each other, be there for your kids and on the bad days remember its a bad day, tomorrow gets better, hug and love each other on the bad days and laugh and look forward to the next good day.

 

Your decision mate, me I'd go for broke! but whatever you decide good luck

 

Neil 24

 

 

Amen brother !

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I fought for this country and got injured in the process, my friends and colleagues died for this country - some by enemy fire, a lot by their own hand after the horror of what they have seen and done, this country mouths platitudes but little else unless the politicians are shamed into it, now we have the prospect of the country being split up, the UK no longer in existence as we know it now, we are being torn apart by racial and religious hatred, and greedy politicians, that is why we are moving - to a place where life is far easier and benign in warmth and friendliness.

This place is not too dissimilar mate, wait till you get here! Racial hatred, greedy politicians and religous hatred. Perhaps not on the scale of UK yet for 2 of those but aboriginal folk might have something to say about racial hatred. And yes, they are still queuing up here to go to Syria and Iraq to take pop shots at yours and my former colleagues. So i suggest, like i had to do, take those specs back to stores as they appear to have a tint of rose in them.

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This place is not too dissimilar mate, wait till you get here! Racial hatred, greedy politicians and religous hatred. Perhaps not on the scale of UK yet for 2 of those but aboriginal folk might have something to say about racial hatred. And yes, they are still queuing up here to go to Syria and Iraq to take pop shots at yours and my former colleagues. So i suggest, like i had to do, take those specs back to stores as they appear to have a tint of rose in them.

 

:laugh:

 

You moving back to blighty pretty soon then.......

OZ is just another first world country,with first world issues. The main difference are the immigration policies. Also,the UK is skint big time. We can not carry on with these massive debts. Australia has a lot of natural resource,this would, enable them to dig themselves out of a hole if necessary. The UK has no such resource,we are a service sector led country. No major manufacturing,no industry and a very uncertain future.

Wanting a change is not a bad thing,for some it works out,for others it doesn't. I for one,will have a fun time trying.

Edited by 7cdb
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Guest Guest6235

We get people wandering through gardens beheading defenceless 80 year old women in the UK. Admittedly it was in London, which may as well be another country to us northerners. There will be problems wherever you go but it's finding the right place for your family.

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:laugh:

 

You moving back to blighty pretty soon then.......

OZ is just another first world country,with first world issues. The main difference are the immigration policies. Also,the UK is skint big time. We can not carry on with these massive debts. Australia has a lot of natural resource,this would, enable them to dig themselves out of a hole if necessary. The UK has no such resource,we are a service sector led country. No major manufacturing,no industry and a very uncertain future.

Wanting a change is not a bad thing,for some it works out,for others it doesn't. I for one,will have a fun time trying.

Yes, we will be moving back home as soon as we are ready. Uk sounds more of a challenge than the easy ride Australia offers (tongue going in cheek right about.. now).

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